We may enjoy the odd selfie, some more than others (I’m talking to you Kim K!), but generally speaking, if we really think about it, how do we feel about ourselves? We know how we feel about others most of the time but to look inside ourselves is a little more…uncomfortable.
“There is one basic human need that everyone wants, desires and is perpetually looking for. It’s called love,” says life coach Jacqueline Hurst. “We look for love from our partners, our kids, our parents, our friends we seem to look for it simply everywhere except of course, from ourselves.
I know you think I’ve gone all self-help self-love blah blah on you but wait. Let me explain a little further. Contrary to popular belief, self-love does not make you self-centred, narcissistic or conceited. In fact, it’s pretty much the opposite. It makes you even happier and in turn able to give out even more.”
Here are Jacqueline’s top tips on how to start loving you…
TREAT YOURSELF HOW YOU TREAT YOUR LOVED ONES
When you feed your kids you sit them down at a table to eat their meal. Are you doing the same for you? When your partner wants that special handbag or manbag (!) but won’t buy it for themselves and you go and do that for them, are you spoiling yourself in the same way? The point here is that when you love others you treat them well. Start to treat yourself well. In the words of L’Oreal ‘you are worth it’.
DO WHAT YOU LOVE
Partaking in activities that nourish your soul is very important when it comes to self love. Whether it’s an early night, a great movie, a hot bath, lovely candles or a good book, then you owe it to yourself to incorporate these things into your life. Doing the things you love breeds happiness. It’s a conscious way of telling yourself that you are taking care of yourself. Doing the things you really love to do is you being kind to you. Schedule it, organize it and do it. You will thank yourself for it – trust me.
STOP JUDGING YOURSELF
Speaking to yourself in a negative way is simply mean. We are all learning and growing, and no one gets it right all the time, neither do they have a perfect life. When you give up on beating yourself up that’s when the real love comes in. You wouldn’t speak to someone you love how you speak to yourself so it’s time to lock that stuff down and change your tune. Think of a baby learning to walk. It falls down a lot and it simply gets back up again, smiling, and gives it another go. It doesn’t berate itself. The tip here is this – when you judge you miss the lesson.
Saying no does not make you unlikable or mean. It doesn’t make you a bad person; it makes you clever. If you really want to love you, you will take care of you and not people please. Loving yourself means respecting yourself and that means you are your priority. You don’t ever have to do anything, it’s always a choice. And in that respect you can choose to say no. Give yourself some self respect, time and some love back by getting on the no-bus. You will be amazed at how things change, how much more time you have and how great your ‘self’ will feel when you start to put you first.
ABOUT JACQUELINE HURST
Jacqueline Hurst is a trailblazing ‘mind’ expert, knowledgeable public speaker and ground breaking life coach. Her worldwide success is based in her unique approach and coaching methods. Jacqueline works in her private practice helping clients with a wide variety of issues and specialises in emotional eating and body image. Her online school, ‘The Life Class’ is also paving the way for a new generation of self-development for both people who wish to become life coaches themselves or, for those of us who want to simply learn how to live more optimally for ourselves, by thinking, behaving and acting with a higher degree of emotional intelligence. Jacqueline’s private practice can be found here and her school is here